If Happy Ever After Did Exist
by Ialwaysshipthedoomedones
Summary: ..I would still be holding you like this.


_Yeah, I know it's hard to remember, the people we used to be. It's even harder to picture, that you're not here next to me. You say it's too late to make it, but is it too late to try?_

He lays in bed the morning after, his heart beating so hard he thought it might explode. He turns his head to the side and comes back to earth with a thud. Her blonde hair is sprawled along the pillow, a smile is settled along her lips and he thinks he may have broken her heart all over again. He untangles her from him, fighting back the bile in his throat. Silently he pulls back on his clothes and leaves the flat without a word.

..

When he gets home Carla is sat cross-legged on the sofa, tears cascading down her pale, gaunt cheeks. His mind flashes back to last time he has seen her in this state and he can almost feel her hands banging against his chest in frustration once again. This time she doesn't even acknowledge his presence, minus a small glance in his direction. Her eyes are red and puffy and he knows she hasn't slept a bit.

..

They argue. They always argue but this is something more, something heated and far beyond the angry words they usually share. They throw things and hurl insults but inside he feels is heart has broken into unbearably unfixable pieces. His guilt eats away at his and every time he looks into her emerald eyes he thinks he'll fall apart.

..

He is totally, irrevocably in love with her. Their hands fit together, their bodies like two pieces of a puzzle but he knows now he has lost the best thing he ever had. She can read in his eyes that he is hiding something, holding something back. She is already packing her bags and she doesn't yet know the full extent of his betrayal. All she knows is that she is fighting a battle that is already lost and she can't keep giving when she gets nothing in return.

..

He follows her out of the flat and down the street, she still doesn't stop. They keep walking and walking and eventually end up somewhere oh so familiar. She storms ahead, desperate for a retrieve from her constant heartache. His mind is in overdrive when he spots her face in the crowd of people. Her bellowing, bitter voice brings Carla to a halt and she instantly realises her words are laced with a hint of smugness. Her eyes dash from him to her and back again and her heart sinks. "Carla-" He whispers, sensing her realisation. But his words fall on death ears.

..

He's sobbing now, heart wrenching pleas. He lays his heart on his sleeve for all the world to see but he's already lost her. She's rushing through the crowds, away from everything she's ever known. Eventually he catches her hand, pulling her back around to face him. "I love you Carla, please" He whispers, his face inches away from hers "You've lost me Peter" She pulls away from with a violent shrug and heads back off into the rush of people.

..

They both find themselves at the station now, he is lagging slightly behind, desperately trying to catch up with her. But she is fiercely determined, and for once she listens to her head. She could cope alone, if alone was what she was. But now burdened with the tiny life that grows inside her, unwanted and now fatherless her world seemed to crumble at her feet with no way for her to catch it.

..

Her train stood in front of her, almost ready to leave. Carla hoped it was going to take her away from this pain but she knew it'd only lead her into an even more torturous world. She slips in when the doors open and collapses against an empty window seat. Peter is there in an instant, his hands against the window and Carla thinks she could run into his arms and forgive him everything just to feel his touch again. But she doesn't, and she can't. She won't. What she does do is bring her hand up against the window to meet his, allowing him to see her tears just as freely as she sees his. The train pulls away, and Peter walks beside it before it speeds up. "I love you" She whispers to him from the other side of the window and then the train is gone, and with it is the remains of the fragments of Peter's heart. Left in Carla like shards of broken glass.


End file.
